Dead Shadows
by thishazeleyeddemon
Summary: short twoshot AU where Fili and Thorin don't die in the Battle of Five Armies, but Kili does. Twoshot people, it's complete.
1. Rebirth

Darkness.

That's all that's there. It's so dark, and cold.

I open my eyes. The first thing I see is the full moon hanging overhead like a silver eye. It's comforting.

The second thing I notice is the smell. It's coppery, and…rotten. It's explained as soon as I look to the side.

Bodies. There are hundreds, no thousands of bodies. Twisted and mangled, with gaping wounds covering them. Some have arrows or swords sticking out of them. The sight nauseates me. Some of the dead here were fair and beautiful, with pointed ears. Others are horrid monsters. I kick the body of a little, twisted thing. Hatred rises. It seems like a thing that needs killing on general principles.

I turn away and nearly trip over a long stick on the ground. Ugh. Clumsy me, watch where you're going!

But then I get curious. It doesn't look like a stick. It looks like a staff.

I reach down and pick it up.

At my touch, black spreads along the wood. It's a long, shepherd's crook, carved with images of night. I look up at the diamond stars. Beautiful.

Once I have the staff in my hand, I notice how right it feels there. Good. Now I have a weapon.

Now what do I do?

I look around and spy lights through the trees. Yes! A city.

I look back across the plain. All I can see that way are bodies, a dark forest, and a huge mountain. Should I go explore the forest? I wonder what's in there…No. It's too cold. Besides, there could be anything in there. I set off toward the town.

Once I'm out of the thin wall of trees I stare at the town stretching across the lake. It's clearly been through quite a time recently, there's burn marks all over. I hear shouts.

I'm about to walk over there when I realize. I don't know anything. Not even my name. What's my name?

_Kili Blackarrow._

Huh? Who said that?

I whirl, before realizing no one's there. I look up at the moon.

"Did you say that?" I whisper.

Why do I think the moon said it? I wonder momentarily, before shrugging. So I'm Kili Blackarrow. Well fine, good of a name as any.

I cast a look at my reflection in the lake. Nice enough. Though why can't I have a beard? And why do I have black eyes? And I mean pure black eyes. Hmm. Whatever, it doesn't matter.

Once inside the Lake-Town, it becomes clear that they really have been through one hell of a fight recently. There are doctors in all places, and the smell of the wounded and dead everywhere. The moans and occasional screams nauseate me even more then the battl-

"Oh, excuse me- what the hell?"

I just walked right through a person. I walked right through a person. What's going on here? Am I dead? Am I a ghost?

Got to get out of here. Can't stay here.

I run out of the general bustle. Okay, no one here. Hey, who's in there?

Hoisting myself up on the window, I peer inside. There are two men, both injured. They're bandaged. And short. The taller, stockier one with dark hair is asleep. I notice the other one, the one with blond hair and a large nose is crying. What's he crying about? I want to comfort him, even if he can't see me, but how am I supposed to get in without someone noticing a door open-whoa!

Okay, one minute I was outside, and the next I'm walking out of a shadow. The hell? Hmm, maybe if I do this…

I reach a hand out, and think about a door opening. When I look again, there's a…rip in the shadow. I can't explain it, but it's a doorway through…somewhere, to somewhere.

Suddenly feeling overwhelmed, I sit down on the floor. This is a lot to take in. All of a sudden, I realize how silly I must look. Get it together Kili.

Rising, I listen to what the blond man is sobbing. It's my name, Kili, over and over again. It's as if he's…mourning the dead.

Am I _his_ Kili? Am I dead? Am I a ghost? Is that why I'm invisible, untouchable? I-I-nnggh.

Ignoring anything else, I zip through the shadow door. Outside, I'm on the mountain. So high up…

I'm so cold. My flesh is chilled. My chest doesn't hurt if it doesn't rise and fall. There's no thump in my chest. All evidence I'm dead.

I look up at the moon. Why, Moon? Who am I? Why am I here?

_Four Months Later. Fili and Thorin are returning to move the dwarves to Erebor. Fili's P.O.V._

In front of me on the trail, I see a man walking. Who is that?

As he gets closer, my heart stops.

Kili.

I leap off my pony, ready to greet my brother happily.

His eyes are black on black. They glitter coldly.

"How can you see me," he asks. "And who are you?"

He might as well have hit me with a sledgehammer.


	2. Family Ties

Thorin stared with shock at the creature in front of him and Fili. Almost unconsciously, he fingered the hilt of Orcrist, his sword.

The creature looked and talked like Kili. Except for the black hair, and the somber black eyes, that made you feel like Aule had looked into your soul and found you unworthy.

"Kili?" he said, riding forward. "You honestly don't remember us?"

Kili frowned. "Well, I've seen you before. Four months ago. You were asleep, and you," he said to Fili, "were crying. You were crying for someone with my name. Why, who are you?"

A quick look at Fili said he wouldn't be of much use for a bit. So Thorin said, "Well, if you really don't know us, let us introduce ourselves. This is Fili, who should get back on his pony now, and I am Thorin Oakenshield."

But Kili shook his head, long strands of dark hair falling in front of his face. "Sorry. Means nothing to me. Of course, I've only been around four months so…" He smiled at Thorin for the first time. "I'm Kili Blackarrow, but you probably already knew that."

Before Thorin could reply, Fili, who had mounted his pony by now, said, "You said you've only been around four months. Can I ask your first memory?"

Kili looked a little bemused by the request. "I woke up on a great battlefield, lying in a pool of blood. Little fires were twinkling here and there, and the moon looked down on the dead like one who mourned the fallen and whose pain was even worse because they could do nothing." A smile crossed his lips, but it was faint and fleeting and held not a trace of humor. "That was the night I found no one could see me."

A suspicion growing in his mind, Fili said, just to be saying something, "And you've been alone all this time?"

Kili shook his head. "I have some friends. Other spirits like me. There's Helega and Nitira, and Karuk."

Fili nodded. "If you don't mind, me and my uncle need to talk about something private." Fili and Thorin dismounted, and walked somewhat off the trail. For some reason, neither realized of course Kili was going to follow them. Neither dwarf saw him either.

Fili led Thorin off the path into a grove of trees. The leaves were emerald, and soft sunlight slipped through the trees like molten gold.

Since Fili judged this off the path, he immediately began talking a mile a minute, gesturing and making amber-gold hair fly every which way. "Did you see that? It's Kili! My brother! Isn't this awesome!" he laughed, actually doing a victory dance. It bore an uncanny resemblance to the Tarantella.

Thorin held up a hand, making Fili stop. "Fili, we don't know if it's Kili. As far as we know, it's a sprite that bears an uncanny resemblance to Kili. Granted, it looks that way, but we don't know."

"I do, however," a voice said. Turning, they saw, without a lot of surprise, Gandalf.

"Gandalf," Thorin said. "Is it Kili?"

Gandalf frowned. "I wish I could tell you otherwise, but I would be lying. It is Kili. I would suggest you not inform him about me just yet; his kind bares a deep jealousy of anything with magic that can be seen. Even if I did enable his family to see him."

Fili caught a glimpse of some shadow behind a tree. Squinting, he realized that Kili was spying on them. He decided to let it go. It was such a Kili thing to do, really. "Why doesn't he remember us?" Fili asked.

Yes, Kili thought. Why can't I…

Gandalf sighed. "I don't know. It is a rare but not impossible occurrence. Even harder to predict is which gets their memories returned. I once met a sprite who won her memories back in a card game."

Thorin nodded. "Will you be accompanying us to the Blue Mountains and the Iron Hills, to bring who wants to come back to Erebor?"

Gandalf nodded. "I have not better to do; and if this recent adventure is any forewarning, you will most certainly need my assistance!"

All of a sudden, Kili felt as overwhelmed as he had on his first day. Rushing back to the path, once he got there he removed his bow and the quiver of arrows, laid his staff down, sat down with his back to a tree, and tried to think.

I have a family. A family! A brother, a mother, and I'll assume Thorin is some relation of mine. What if whatever other family I have doesn't want me? My memory only goes back four months, and I've already been called devil, and monster, and-

"You know, whenever you act like this it's a safe assumption something major has happened. What mess do I need to drag you out of now?"

Jolted out of his brooding, he looked up into the face of Nitira. Nitira was a female dwarf who'd died in Smaug's raid and been reborn as a fire sprite. She often said the whole world runs on irony. She was a beautiful creature, albeit missing a beard because she'd singed it off in her first week, and it had never grown back. Her eyes were filled with dancing flames.

"I-I found my family, Nitira! And they can see me!"

"Really?" Nitira said. The elated look in her face endeared her to him even more. "That's awesome, Kili!" She knelt and flung her arms round him, giving him a face full of black hair that faded to red.

Of course, that's when Thorin, Fili, and Gandalf returned. Gandalf smiled, he'd met Nitira and knew she was an excellent friend for young Kili.

"Hello," she said, drawing back and rising.

While Thorin was introducing them, Gandalf noticed where Fili was looking and sent a hasty mental message with the explanation of the lack of beard on Nitira. He sent one to Thorin too; Gandalf knew Nitira had excellent hearing.

After all the pleasantries were exchanged, Thorin turned to Kili and said, "Kili, we-"

"I know you're my family." Kili interrupted.

Thorin blinked a few times before deciding how he knew that didn't matter, and continued, "Well then, we would like you to accompany us back to the Blue Mountains."

Kili, who by now had gotten up, cast a glance at Nitira. "Well, I-

"Go, you dumb buffoon. I'll come and visit you." Nitira interrupted.

Feeling relieved, he hugged Nitira, whispering so only she could hear, "you're the best, Nitira."

"Then it's settled!" Thorin said. "Give him a pony."

Kili, embarrassingly, needed help mounting it. But he did, and Gandalf, Fili, Thorin, and him set off for the Blue Mountains.

Kili looked behind him. Nitira grinned at him, before giving him a salute and flying off. Smiling widely, he faced ahead again. It was sunset now.

This was the beginning of a very happy time, he thought.

A/N: This story is finished, so please don't follow it.

Nitir is Khuzdul for fire-starter, so that's where I got her name.

Heleg is Elvish for ice. Helega is a winter-sprite who used to be a elf.


End file.
